I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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