She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
So many bounce houses so little time
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
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