Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
