I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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