she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
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