How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
