Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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