Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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