Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
