I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
