Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
