I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
