I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
