Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
