separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
She's the barista slut.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
