This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
