I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
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