How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
