I'm gonna have a badass scar
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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