Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
