all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize