girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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