okay pat passed out under dana's car
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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