I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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