dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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