Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
