Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
