My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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