dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i just google imaged poop.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
