i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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