Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
