Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
