i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
