I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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