Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize