Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
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