Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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