The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
