my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
