Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I accidentally burped into my bong.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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