idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
