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Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
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