Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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