your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
After last night, I could never be a politician.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
