The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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