Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
