Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize
