I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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