I can't watch pbs sober anymore
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
