I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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